This just in.
Posted on 11/16/13
By Lee Coleman
The vast majority of the male workforce in North Dakota didn’t show up for work last Thursday.
Watch out Bambi. The gunslingers are out in force.
The new gun season for deer is obviously a yearly event but if I didn’t know better, I would have sworn it was a rite of passage.
Folks love their deer hunting. Either it is the wild gamey taste of venison or another chance to hang a dead deer on a bedroom wall.
I love to eat deer. And most other wild game.
I have just never been one to climb a dang tree at 4 o’clock in the morning amidst numbing cold temperatures to wait for some unsuspecting deer to step in front of my scope.
Truthfully, I don’t climb trees because if I nailed a trophy deer, I’d likely fall out of said tree because of my excitement and never be able to look up again and admire my tag.
Back in the day when deer blinds weren’t used, I’d go camping and leave the tree thing to my dad. I was an experienced camper so I would assume the quartermaster duties of the campsite.
Now, if I had the chance, I would hunt behind a blind.
Just like I’m excited to maybe have the chance to go ice fishing this winter. Love to fish but never did the ice thing.
I enjoyed rabbit hunting as a kid but the first time my shot grazed the Easter bunny and I didn’t kill him, hearing that rascally rabbit scream and cry like a baby nearly killed me
My dad told me to get over it and cut his throat to put him out of misery.
Well, so much for getting the good stuff in my Easter basket the next year.
Deer hunters take everything seriously.
My dad once told me to use Cheese Whiz as toothpaste so if I didn’t eat breakfast, at 4 a.m., I wouldn’t get hungry.
Lovely image. Now all I needed was a deer horn to pick the cheese outta my teeth.
My friend Rod Uecker brought me a surprise earlier this week. It was salami made of duck and beef.
Pretty dang good. I truly appreciated it. Duck and beef salami on an onion roll with mayonnaise and sharp cheddar cheese made me want to slap myself and beg for some buttermilk.
But instead, I opted for a diet coke and didn’t climb any trees this week.
Must have been that wild gamey taste.
Coleman is the editor of the Republican and can be contacted at email@example.com.